It's been nearly two years since Zack Steffen received "the call." He still thinks about it, too. Since the day that call came, it's impacted every aspect of his career. Nothing has been the same since.
Steffen spent several years as the USMNT's starter as goalkeeper and to the surprise of many, he was left off the 2022 World Cup roster by then coach Gregg Berhalter. His dreams were dashed and, from there, everything spiraled.
Injury issues popped up. His club situation as the No. 2 goalkeeper at Manchester worsened. He hasn't played for the USMNT since. What once felt like destiny was gone. It was hard to accept. Steffen, by his own admission, struggled mentally. His belief in himself was shattered.
"Nobody wants to get rejected," Steffen said to GOAL. "Everybody wants to be part of something, and I want to be part of the national team. I want to be part of winning teams. So, yeah, it f*cking hurt, and it still hurts to this day."
It's not that all of his problems stemmed from that phone call from Berhalter, but it was a key point. It was the type of setback that changes a player but, more importantly, can change the person.
This season was about using those changes for good. In need of playing time, Steffen returned to MLS, signing with the Colorado Rapids. His form has returned. So, too, has his confidence and belief. In Colorado, Steffen has found himself in a locker room full of like-minded people.
The Rapids feel overlooked, under-appreciated and unwelcome, but mostly they feel angry. That attitude has them near the top of the Western Conference and fighting for an MLS Cup just one year after being in the league's basement.
Steffen is using that mindset as fuel, too. After several really difficult years, he says that he is finally feeling like his old self again, and that transformation is happening at the perfect time. The 29-year-old is ready to reclaim his USMNT dream, having spent the last few months reclaiming the confidence that was drained out of him the moment he hung up that phone in 2022.
"You hear outside noise," Steffen said. "You get in your head, you get down, and you start to f*cking doubt yourself a little bit, but that's where you just got to f*cking shut those voices up."
In the Wednesday Convo, a weekly Q&A with central figures in the American soccer scene, GOAL caught up with Steffen to discuss how he's rebuilt himself, the culture in Colorado, dealing with heartbreaks and his USMNT hopes.
NOTE: Some responses have been edited for brevity and clarity purposes.